I don’t know who needs to hear this, but it’s probably you: a man can use correct grammar and still be hot enough to blow your back out.
It’s time to bust the myth of the grammar nerd. You know the stereotype: pale, hunched over, wearing Crocs with socks, correcting people’s tweets and whispering “could have, not could of” at parties they weren’t invited to.
It’s my Daddy duty to let you boys know that the Grammar Nerds have gotten a Glow Up, and they are gorgeous. Only Hollywood, middle-school bullies, and people who still pepper their conversations with “Bro” and “peeps” perpetuate the idea that good grammar and sex appeal are mutually exclusive.
Reading is fundamental, but so is grammar. Remember that the next time the liberry is open.
You can learn how to structure a sentence and hold your own on the dance floor at the club.
How can that be? Because confidence is sexy. Those who know how to communicate are confident. They know when to use “whom” rather than “who”.
And that, my friends, is power, a mysterious power that lets you know that they can offer you a linguistic rim job instead of the tired tossed salad you’re so used to getting.
Why are Bianca Del Rio’s texts and tweets so lethal? She has an extensive vocabulary, chooses her words wisely, and punctuates her sentences appropriately so they are clearly understood. Nothing takes the wind out of a vicious tweet like a run-on sentence that’s inappropriately punctuated so no one can understand it. The insulting tweet becomes a joke to the recipient, and the joke is on the sender.
There is a sex appeal and charisma to being able to say and spell what you mean.
Just because you respect the rules of English grammar doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy gangbangs, wearing leather, romantic experiences, working out, or watching porn. If I’m flirting with someone at a bar and they whisper, “I proofread my texts”, I get an erection.
Using grammar correctly doesn’t make you boring; it makes you competent.
Here are several quotes from the current President of the United States, demonstrating his competency level as Commander in Chief.
● “We’re going to build a wall, and it’s going to be a great wall, a fantastic wall, the best wall.”
● “I thought it would be a glamorous project. I do a lot of things for glamour. I like glamour. Do you know the word glamour? I love glamour.”
● “We’re going to win bigly.”
● “The meeting was very productive for I.”
● “I know words. I have the best words.”
What makes these Presidential errors stand out is not only their frequency but also their absurdity. Trump’s typo-ridden tendencies often spill over from the podium into his Twitter posts. As a man with the 11th largest Twitter account in the world, someone should be checking it. Accuracy matters—it always matters.
If Mr. President has anything to teach us, it’s that poor grammar doesn’t convey much sex appeal, charisma, or competence.
I’m old enough to have been around, under, and through the block several times. Life experience has proven that “Sexy and Literate” is a valid aesthetic, as powerful as 6-pack abs, a chiseled jaw-line, or an ass you can serve tea off of.
Using correct grammar doesn’t cancel out sexiness; it enhances it.
Which text would you most likely reply to:
– “u up?”
Or:
– “Are you awake? I was hoping to see you.”
Once, I got a text from a potential love interest that read, ” Your cute.” And just like that, the mood was murdered. Grammar is foreplay. It’s intelligence with a wink. Words mean things, letters go places, and punctuation isn’t decorative.
If you want to impress someone, show them that you are intelligent and self-aware and that you can distinguish between “they’re,” “there,” and “their.”
If you want the inbox of your favorite dating app to blow up, proofread your profile. You can be hot, cool, & sexy, and still know that “alot” is not a real word.
Being thoughtful about your words doesn’t make you boring; it makes you powerful. Using correct grammar is a commitment. It lets someone know you cared enough to proofread your message before sending it. It also says you will probably remember their birthday, favorite color, and what turns them on. Romance isn’t dead, it’s just hiding behind an incomplete sentence.
Do you know that warm, flushed feeling you get when you begin to sweat and feel a slight tingle down there when you receive a properly formatted, punctuated message from a crush? THAT is Grammar Yahtzee! You’re a winner, baby! Anyone who shows that sort of potential is a keeper.
We need to take our voices seriously as a community and as a nation. We need to choose words like they matter because they do, especially now in a world full of noise, empty promises, speed, shortcuts, and hateful innuendos.
These days, choosing to be clear, kind, and correct in speaking and writing is rare. It’s brave, and we need that.
It’s that time of year again, so let me say this to the 2025 graduates: You are walking into a world that desperately needs people who can communicate clearly. People who don’t just yell louder but speak better. People who can write a great email, tell a great story, and stand up for something without their message getting lost in translation.
The world needs and will always need leaders. Leaders take the time to say what they mean, proofread their texts before sending them, and care about being understood.
If you’re not that person yet, that’s ok. No matter what age you are, you’re here. You’re growing. You’re learning.
There is nothing sexier than someone who knows exactly who they are… and knows how to spell it.
Thank you for reading. If you want to comment on this article or suggest future articles, please email me at RyanRockfordNYC@gmail.com.
Until next time.
