The word "side" is unique in the English language. It can be used as a root word (as in the side of a building), a suffix (outside), or a prefix (sidecar) – even a sexual identity. In my day, the choices were gay or straight. The topic of sexual identity was barely discussed, much less elaborated on. So, when I hear the word side, my fat ass thinks of bacon, macaroni and … [Read more...] about The Rockford Files: Pick A Side
The Rockford Files
Hook, Line, and Sinker
Queerbaiting: What it is, Why it's wrong, and How to stop it. What is Queerbaiting? Over the years, "Queerbaiting" has expanded to include a variety of scenarios. Still, for this article, Queerbaiting is when pop culture creators plant the seed of a same-sex relationship to draw in LGBTQ audiences but don't allow that relationship to thrive or develop into something … [Read more...] about Hook, Line, and Sinker
Cruising: A casualty of the digital age
If you’re expecting to read something about love on the High Seas or are looking for the Top 10 reasons you should never take a boyfriend on an Atlantis Cruise -- sorry, Sis, this article is about cruising without a boat. This week, Daddy talks “cruising”, the down-and-dirty kind. Thanks to the internet and dating apps, cruising is no longer a tool kept in our sexual … [Read more...] about Cruising: A casualty of the digital age
The Rockford Files: True Value
“I don’t want money. Only people who pay their bills want that.” Oscar Wilde Money is a necessity of life. We worry about it. We dream about it. We invent ways to make more of it. Most people have some. Some people have too much. Too many people need more. According to my accountant, I have enough money to last me the rest of my life - if I die within the … [Read more...] about The Rockford Files: True Value
The Rockford Files: Spend Some Cash On Your Dash
It was a pleasant afternoon in New York. Stephen (a.k.a. Sissy Carter) and I were wrapping up brunch al fresco as the sun was beginning to set. Dusk is the magical time of day that reliably draws Hell’s Kitchen queens out of their cocoons and unswervingly towards Happy Hour, like moths to a flame. It's also the perfect time to people-watch and participate in one of our … [Read more...] about The Rockford Files: Spend Some Cash On Your Dash
Isn’t It Ironic?
Take it from me, the chances of a fully vaccinated person becoming infected with the COVID-19 virus are extremely low – but not zero. Regular Ambush readers may remember that I detailed my vaccination experience here, in this very column. I blasted at the anti-vax movement, dismissing its supporters with science and touting the benefits of vaccination. I strongly … [Read more...] about Isn’t It Ironic?
Not Throwing Away My Shot!
I am fully vaccinated against the Covid-19 virus. Now what? I had been on the hunt for an available vaccine appointment for some time. Someone suggested I visit the New York Department of Health website. I found the site in less than a minute and, with the blazing speed of experience, I filled out the same questionnaire I’d filled out dozens of times before, and without … [Read more...] about Not Throwing Away My Shot!
Ass Cancer and Me – The Hole Story, Part 2
The result of my biopsy identified pre-cancerous cells, and treatment would be necessary. The cherry on top of this HPV sundae--I also had a fistula in the lining of my rectum. “A what?” I asked, immediately returning his call. In a rather pre-occupied tone, I was told: "A fistula is an abnormal passage that sometimes forms from the anal canal to the skin near the … [Read more...] about Ass Cancer and Me – The Hole Story, Part 2
Ass Cancer and Me – The Hole Story
One morning, not very long ago, I woke up to discover that small growth clusters had begun to appear around the base of my penis and testicular area. I panicked and did what anyone with a medical mystery to solve would do – I ran straight to Google. There is a reason we should never self-diagnose ourselves using Google. Based on my findings, by late afternoon, I was almost … [Read more...] about Ass Cancer and Me – The Hole Story
Weapon of Glass Destruction
(Sometimes) Father knows best. When I was a kid, my grandfather gave me a slingshot for my birthday. It wasn't the usual, ‘Y’-shaped, wooden, piece of crap, slingshot you could pick up at Time Saver. This one was "professional." It was made of aluminum alloy rods and shaped in such a way that the handle extended backward into a wrap-around support bar for the wrist that would … [Read more...] about Weapon of Glass Destruction
